|
|
Digital Cameras - Camcorders - A Promise to Ourselves: A Journey Through Fatherhood and Divorce
|
List Price: $24.95
Our Price: $13.55
Your Save: $ 11.40 ( 46% )
Availability: Usually ships in 24 hours
Manufacturer: St. Martin's Press
|
Average Customer Rating:  
|
|
Binding: Hardcover
Dewey Decimal Number: 792.028092
EAN: 9780312363369
ISBN: 0312363362
Label: St. Martin's Press
Manufacturer: St. Martin's Press
Number Of Items: 1
Number Of Pages: 240
Publication Date: 2008-09-23
Publisher: St. Martin's Press
Release Date: 2008-09-23
Studio: St. Martin's Press
|
|
|
|
|
|
Spotlight customer reviews:
|
Customer Rating:
Summary: Alec does us all a service
Comment: I didn't have too much of an opinion of Alec one way or the other except that I do get a big kick out of some of his roles. As well, I have always liked the plucky un-phony traditional values he seems to embody. I had a feeling that he like many others was mistreated by the sewer matrix divorce system. Boy did he get unlucky in love . Clearly he deserves some compassion and understanding; I have always had disdain for couples who once "loved" each other enough to marry ; a few short years later become vitriol factories ready to destroy their ex mates. Gross, I guess it cannot be helped when you are involved with a mentally ill narcisistic personality.
Customer Rating:
Summary: Sad Experience, Good Advice
Comment: While Alec Baldwin and I are diametrically opposed politically, we are unfortunately completely aligned in our experience of an outrageously expensive divorce and custody battle (both of us have spent well over a million dollars fighting for our "rights" to be a father) fraught with gutless participants, unwilling to recognize the true costs of parental alienation on the lives of the children to whom they claim to have the best interests in mind.
While I was attracted to the book by my own dismal experience with the Los Angeles "family courts judicial" system, I was expecting to read a whining, salacious text vetting out the bad behavior of Baldwin's unrepresented ex. Fortunately enough, whether through Baldwin's own good sense or because those dirty details were sealed by court transcripts, most of those were keep out of the book. Instead, Baldwin delivers enough of his own personal details to make the painful point of a father locked out of his daughter's childhood and he, more importantly, devotes a fair amount of the book to the insight he has gained about the realities of Parental Alienation, how it is identified, how it manifests itself and how you might approach marriage, divorce and co-parenting to mitigate it.
This book stands out in the limited, but growing body of material on this subject. Making the point that if a parent with the resources of Baldwin can't win the fight for equal custody, how can anybody else. What was his crime? What did he or his daughter do to deserve the punishment?
With some limited examples from other parents, Baldwin also attempts to round out his own experience. Frankly, I think he held back. Parental Alienation is worse than you can imagine. The best realization comes at the end of the book when Baldwin points out a parent has to hate their ex-mate more than they love their own child to perpetuate this behavior. Think about how sick that is. How much damage it does to a child.
Some idiots might try to argue that PAS doesn't exist, since it is not formally recognized as a psychological disease but I've never seen one of them even attempt to directly argue or refute any of the eight symptoms Gardner clearly describes in his material. All eight of which were clearly present in Baldwin's case, mine and countless others.
The "actors" in our judicial system are gutless. Baldwin rightfully points out that, wrongfully, time is on the side of the alienating/custodial parent since our judicial system doesn't act quickly to retain the God given right both parents have to be involved. Gardner pointed out the solution was to grant the targeted/non-custodial parent more time with their child whenever alienation occurs. But, as Baldwin points out, the deck is rigged, the "actors" have a system that works for them the way it is. It keeps them retained until every dime a caring parent has is spent to fight for their child. How screwed up is that with more than 50% of marriages ending in divorce? These children are our future and some of us care about that.
I believe the best work of material Baldwin could do is a film on the subject, but not one so transparent as this book to focus on his own story. The story I think needs to be told is the story of unadulterated tolerance for the alienating behavior that goes on all around every one of us. Obviously this behavior is not done in a vacuum. Alienators operate in a circle of friends who support their efforts to isolate their children from the target parent. Whether is be through the diatribe of bull crap reasons they hear as to why the other parent is not in their child's life or just because they don't care to become involved. Would they still be friends with the alienator if they saw them as a kleptomaniac who can't help but steal? Well then why do they find it acceptable to tolerate a parent who steals their child away from their counterpart? It's simple, if you're not co-parenting, you're probably the problem.
Our societal values have to change here. Not just those of the participants, the litigants or the judges, lawyers and evaluators. This mirror needs to be turned on all of us. We need to cherish the relationship a child has with BOTH of their parents. Anything less is a crime.
Customer Rating:
Summary: Mr Baldin has barely scratched open the festering sore
Comment: Mr. Balwin is on target correct about the divorce industry, corruption, bias and need for change.
There is a WRONGFUL DAMAGES LAWSUIT in Montreal, Canada(10 years in the making) to be heard May 11,2009.
Any legitimate party interested in a copy of the motion and witnessing a wrongful damages lawsuit against the government, the lawyers and administrators of justice (yes Mr. Balwdin, even us Canadians have had enough of the persecution), need only contact dorvalwilliam@gmail.com.
So guys (and yes 2nd wives and children), stop whining and start SUING for your rights.
Bravo and well done Mr. Baldwin. We hope more people will stand up and be counted.
William Levy
Status of Men Canada (ad hoc 1997)
Ethics Committee
Alienated Parent
Customer Rating:
Summary: Really shocking but not surprising
Comment: One thing that comes to mind after reading this book is what would alec Balwins wife Kim have done if the roles were reversed and what was done to alec by her were done by alec to her.I think a woman such as herself has no idea or even for a minute would do a role reversal for if they were capable of such a thing their would be sanity in her thought process which clearly their isnt in hers.In alienating this innocent daughter of theirs who does she harm? The daughter of course,Shes deprived the father akec of his daughter and daughter Ireland of a father all for her twisted agenda of retaliation against Alec balwin. I wonder how Kim would react if she were trying to reach her daughter for ten days and some monster was not letting her by turning off the daughters phone.Parential alienation is oh my god so clear here. Really this Kim should have been sent to jail.
But lets be real here we live in a womans world.The custody system and child support system is 100% biased towards a woman. Why should alec balwin have to prove himself to see his own child because a clearly poor example of a human kim uses an all too ready to accomodate court system to further her agenda here.
I have a child and shared custody and fortunate for me the mother is the complete opposite of kim and knows that a solid relationship with the father benefits the child is every imaginable way.
The family court system will never change and monsters like this kim will always be around and victims like alec will have to overcome this.One small hope though that is probable though is that a bond will develop between alec and ireland when she is older.Wont make up for the fact that his child was seized from him by a monster woman but still it is something,quite abit actually. I would imagine that if I had no relationship with my father(which i did though,I grew up with both parents) and was brainwashed by a sick mother that eventually their would come a time as I matured that I would see that well maybe mom just isnt all their and wonder about if or how she destroyed my relationship with my father and the damage it did to both of us.
Customer Rating:
Summary: Finally some publicity for Fathers
Comment: A lot of innocent fathers, like my brother, have committed suicide over the corrupt "family" court system. Dead fathers don't talk. No one keeps statistics on how many innocent fathers/men/boys have been negatively affected by VAWA, parental alienation, "family" court or the corrput child support system.
Too bad it has to take a celebrity to bring to light on how corrupt the system has become. And how easy it is for women to alienate the father from his children & use false charges. Amazing how fast everyone believes all fathers are guilty/bad.
Our children are the biggest losers. One day women will start to catch on that this type of corruption (where one Citizen gets most of the power
over another) has happened before in history.
And that the ending is never a good one for the new Supercitizen. History teaches us lessons if we are patient enough to read about them.
Here's a website someone recommended to me to learn more about true statistics that paint a different story than what the media has told you.
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/female-male/
|
|
|
Editorial Reviews:
|
“I have been through some of the worst of contentious divorce litigation,” Alec Baldwin declares in A Promise to Ourselves. Using a very personal approach, he offers practical guidance to help others avoid the anguish he has endured.
An Academy and Tony Award nominee and a 2007 recipient of Golden Globe, SAG, and Television Critics Association Awards for best actor in a comedy, Alec Baldwin is one of the best-known, most successful actors in the world. His relationship with Kim Basinger, the Academy Award–winning actress, lasted nearly a decade. They have a daughter named Ireland, and for a time, theirs seemed to be the model of a successful Hollywood marriage. But in 2000 they separated and in 2002 divorced. Their split---specifically the custody battle surrounding Ireland---would be the subject of media attention for years to come.
In his own life and others’, Baldwin has seen the heavy toll that divorce can take---psychologically, emotionally, and financially. He has been extensively involved in divorce litigation, and he has witnessed the way that noncustodial parents, especially fathers, are often forced to abandon hopes of equitable rights when it comes to their children. He makes a powerful case for reexamining and changing the way divorce and child custody is decided in this country and levels a scathing attack at what he calls the “family law industry.”
When it comes to his experiences with judges, court-appointed therapists, and lawyers, Baldwin pulls no punches. He casts a light on his own divorce and the way the current family law system affected him, his ex-wife, and his daughter, as well as many other families. This is an important, informative, and deeply felt book on a contentious subject that offers hope of finding a better way.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
